Have dropped focus of trying to rise above body-consciousness that (focus) I had in my past around 9 months spiritual practice

Last updated on 19 Jun 2023

This post shares an edited version of some of my meditation practice notes from early April 2023 to now (early May 2023).

3rd April 2023:

I am now at a spiritual crossroads.

Over past 9 months or so, I have done lot of Jap (chanting of mantra) and Dhyaan (meditation) sadhana. My stamina for Jap Dhyaan has increased in that I can do it for longer periods than earlier. Also my Dhyaan sometimes is somewhat deeper than earlier.

One to two hours at a stretch Jap-dhyaan is normal now. But the mind does make its appearance at times and I get caught up in some thoughts for some short period of time. Then I am able to catch myself, dismiss the thoughts and focus back on Awareness-I.

If I include short breaks (less than or around 5 minutes) driven by mobile timer for activities like putting food in fridge or taking medicines, then I have done it to around 3 hours and I think (if I want to) I can do four hour stretch of japa-dhyaan. This is far more than what I was doing/could do before 2022.

The path to deeper Dhyaan (dissolving into the Awareness-I) has also emerged and I have become comfortable with it.

I have also developed the capacity to stay in my flat without any urge to go outside though I do go to the corridor or to the small common area in the building terrace to get some sun, at times.

But I have not been able to get into a trance or rise above body consciousness, so far. I have to now accept the possibility that I may never have the ability to get into a trance or rise above body consciousness. It may happen in future - that cannot be ruled out. But it may not too.

I think I need to explore if I can find some spiritual adept not far from Puttaparthi (and so accessible to me by say a two hour or lesser time auto/car travel), who himself/herself has the ability to go into trance/rise above body consciousness. If I find that person and the person is willing to interact with me, that would be great.

I have started asking around for such persons. 

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Later in April 2023 update:

On asking and looking around (including on Internet) for such intense jap-dhyaan spiritual adepts near Puttaparthi and accessible to me, or even far away from Puttaparthi but accessible over phone, I could not find any such person (I am excluding any commercial services of this kind; I mean I was looking for somebody who I felt was reliable and safe to approach). Note that I have read articles or viewed videos about some famous contemporary spiritual masters claiming to have been in trance state but they are very big people and so will not be accessible to me over phone for such a discussion.

It now seems to me that having the ability to go into trance or rise above body consciousness is very rare, at least in current times!

I now feel that I need to re-evaluate my spiritual practice and take some decisions.

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2nd May 2023:

Over the past three weeks to a month, since I felt I am at the crossroads and need to decide, I was able to talk to a few persons and that has helped me resolve the crossroads issue. I thank these persons for the time they patiently spent with me on this matter. Also over this period of time, my mind has become clearer about what my future steps should be.

A key decision I have taken (and which I have implemented/done over past week or two) is to drop the focus that I had in my past around 9 months spiritual practice of trying to rise above body-consciousness. I have accepted the possibility that I may never have the ability to get into a trance or rise above body consciousness. I will be continuing my praarthana-jap-dhyaan (prayer-chanting-meditation) sadhana including trying to go deep into the Awareness-I and dissolve in it, and so it certainly is possible that I may have some trance or rising above body consciousness experience in future. That cannot be ruled out. But it may not happen and I am OK with that.

It has also become clear in my mind that I should spend part of my time, when I feel appropriate, on sharing spiritual related content on social media including sharing some of my own spiritual sadhana. That becomes my spiritual social media writer limited (lesser than earlier) Seva activity.

I must also say that I am happy that I invested this around 9 months period of time and lot of effort to try to rise above body consciousness. Now I know that I tried and that it is currently beyond my ability. If I had not tried, I would have had this desire to do this focused effort. Now that desire is gone though I still have the desire to rise above body consciousness but not as a single-pointed goal. Further, this focused effort has given me some side-fruits/side-benefits like increasing my praarthana-jap-dhyaan stamina, deepening my dhyaana, opening the go deep and dissolve into Awareness-I meditation (dhyaan) path etc. Therefore I am very happy that I made this focussed effort even though I have dropped that focus/main objective now.

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Given below are some of my comments (edited) from my associated Facebook post:  https://www.facebook.com/ravi.s.iyer.7/posts/pfbid02P1Uu7tVEjJ4zsnkfTRExCu6mHf9xFZiEaoH7kMH6tn1FRduC7gbETpZf3daDpxzMl :

Will ponder over this Swami quote ["Life is lost in dreaming. Being is lost in becoming."] in this context, ---. Thanks

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Sairam ---, Thanks for your valuable views on this. You wrote, "Swami said His Mission was to help us realize that we are not our body; that we are Atma; made up of the same stuff as GOD (as everything is)." I have some experience of the changeless self in me which is the Atma and which intuitively I know will not die and which one day will not be associated with this body.

But, as of now, I have ****zero**** experience of my inner core (Atma) being free of my body. I mean, I feel locked in to this body.

My serious health challenges in early 2022, for the first time in my adult life, made me physically dependent on others for a few months. I am much better now though I still have limitations and do not have the physical stamina I had prior to the health challenges. And, I guess, that's how it will be for this body till it dies.

I hated that dependence on others. I hated not being self-reliant. Now I am largely self-reliant for many tasks but cannot do much physically strenuous activity for which I rely on maids and other help.

It is during this period of dependence and slowly coming out of that dependence but remembering it rather vividly, that I felt a very strong desire to ****experience**** that I can, through my own will, be temporarily free from my body (go beyond body consciousness) and then return to the body (and in an extreme case just give up the body through my own will). Such ability had been acquired by rishis and few kings and princes in the past, as per Hindu scripture, and a few contemporary mystics claim to have such or similar ability. As I was in a position to make a strong attempt to get such an experience and/or ability, and I had that very strong desire, I made that focused effort for around 9 months.

You wrote, "When you are ready to experience a Cosmic Vision of this, it will happen, whether you are seeking it or not." Yours is a valuable view which many subscribe to. Perhaps you are right. In my case, I try to do my efforts towards such spiritual goals, along with prayer and then leave it to His Divine Will whether the Divine showers His Grace leading to me achieving the goal or not.

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Sairam! Yes, I have tried having that contemplation (mind/body (and everything) being in the self). While that and other meditation contemplations have given me great peace (Prashaanthi) and contentment (thripthi), I have not got into a trance while doing that (or while doing any other meditation practice).

BTW ---, may I ask whether you have been able to get into a trance or rise above body consciousness in your meditation/contemplation? Thanks.

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Sairam ---, Thanks for your response.

Noted your view about my spiritual desire being a roadblock. Perhaps what you say is right but in the spiritual traditions I have been attracted to, and try to follow, having such spiritual desires is OK. All the best to you for your spiritual path.

Fascinating to read about your Atmic vision experience. If I recall correctly, I had come across your description of it earlier somewhere but it had slipped my mind now. Thanks for sharing it here where it is very appropriate. It is truly an extraordinary experience. If you have not published it on some blog or website, I suggest that you do so, as it will become more accessible to people searching the Internet for such matters (as compared to it being only on Facebook).

What you experienced seems to have been a great blessing. I have not had any such experience at all.

An important question (from my perspective): Are you able to get such experiences now when you do some spiritual practice or even in your regular life? If so, I would be glad to know more about when that happens and whether you do something to get that experience or it simply happens to you.

Noted your view, "We each have our own unique experiences relevant to our own path and karma."

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Sairam brother, Thanks for the appreciation of the post.

About the nama japa/mantra japa and self hygiene question: First thing I want to say is that I am only a spiritual aspirant sharing my own spiritual practices and experiences as it perhaps may benefit few persons. I am NOT in a position to give general answers to such questions as I am not that knowledgeable.

In my case, my nama japa (Om Sai Ram is my nama/mantra japa) practice is not tied up with self-hygiene (like doing it only after bath). I do it at various times in the day like early morning when I am still in bed, before bath, during bath, while doing walking exercise, immediately after food (and sometimes while eating food too), at night when I am lying down in bed before I go to sleep etc.

And yes what I have read is that rishis and spiritual sadhakas who lead reclusive lives in wilderness with few facilities and do intense sadhana seem to have skipped personal hygiene matters like daily bath. E.g. Valmiki rishi who when chanting Ram-Ram was in a trance-like state for many days.

From https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valmiki , 'Moved by Narada's words, Agni Sharma began to perform penance and chanted the word "Mara" which meant "die". As he performed his penance for several years, the word became "Rama", a name of the god Vishnu. Huge anthills formed around Agni Sharma and this earned him the name of Valmiki.'

If one goes by such scripture accounts then Maharshi Valmiki surely would not have been into personal hygiene during this penance as how could anthills be formed around him then?

I have read that Ramana Maharshi also used to be in penance for many days. From https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramana_Maharshi, "He spent the first few weeks in the thousand-pillared hall, then shifted to other spots in the temple, and eventually to the Patala-lingam vault so that he could remain undisturbed. There, he spent days absorbed in such deep samādhi that he was unaware of the bites of vermin and pests. Seshadri Swamigal, a local saint, discovered him in the underground vault and tried to protect him.[33] After about six weeks in the Patala-lingam vault, he was carried out and cleaned up. For the next two months he stayed in the Subramanya Shrine, so unaware of his body and surroundings that food had to be placed in his mouth to keep him from starving."

I do not know or recall what Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba has said about japa and self-hygiene.

You also mentioned about Bhagavan saying that Jyoti Dhyaan can be done before bathing.

In my case, I also do dhyaan before bathing (and after bathing too), and do not have any link between dhyaan and self-hygiene.

Of course, from simple perspective of keeping decent bodily health, self-hygiene is important and I do follow that. So I surely am all for self-hygiene but I do not have any particular link between self-hygiene and the Japa and Dhyaana practice that I do. Hope this helps.

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About travel in train and japa question: I do not travel by train nowadays. But when I travel by auto, or sometimes car, I do japa practice. I am sure if I travelled by train, I would do it in the train too.

I think I should share an anecdote. In end January 2022, I was admitted to COVID ICU of Anantapur General Hospital. While in the hospital bed with oxygen tube connected to me, I was doing my japa practice which was giving me lot of mental strength and courage to face my COVID related gasping problem then. The person next to me, whose bed was just two to three feet to the left of my bed, was on ventilator and we exchanged a few words. I recall suggesting to him to chant his ishta devata name and he responded that he is doing that.

What the above anecdote shows is that Japa practice is very accessible to us anytime, even while in an ICU of a hospital. That makes Japa practice a very powerful and useful spiritual practice.

I should also mention that while I was being taken in ambulance from Puttaparthi to Anantapur (one and a half hours travel with me being alone in patient part of ambulance van) while I was gasping for breath due to COVID, I was doing Sai namam chanting which gave me mental strength and courage.

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